Went to Long John Silver’s today with mom & the boy. It’s something to look forward to for me, because the closest Long John Silver’s is over 45 minutes away (over an hour in traffic), so we don’t go there much. Today it was something to REALLY look forward to, because most of the things I had to do today were not fun things. All the stuff that came before Long John’s… not fun. But once we got there… I had fish, chicken, crumbly things (oh, sweet crumbly things), hushpuppies… all the good stuff. We went there tonight because we were already in the neighborhood, and we were already in the neighborhood because that’s where the counselor’s office is. Lots of heavy lifting today.
I learned something there tonight. I need to validate my son’s feelings after he tells me things. Too often, my reaction is to brush off whatever he’s disappointed about, or sad about, or angry about. I need to really listen to him instead, and acknowledge the feelings he has (which are real). I think I would have stayed blind to that for a lot longer if we hadn’t gone in tonight. So even though the past few weeks have been truly nightmarish, and the incidents that led to the counseling appointment are not things I care to go through again, I’m glad we ended up there. A small directional shift that may end up leading us to a point down the road that’s miles away from where we would have been otherwise.